I don't know...

I was thinking that I should post something, but I have no idea what...

We had a nice relaxing Spring Break...I love having A home all the time. We hung out with friends, and Daddy, we went to Manhattan for a night to see G-ma Kathi, and A got to spend a lot of time with a wonderful friend.

We seeded a big part of the front yard, and I think it may have died already. Hopefully not, but the freezing weather making another appearance can't help the poor grass.

The most exciting thing in my life right now is the upcoming ultrasound for baby number 5. I am feeling all kinds of things...I am excited, anxious, not excited, and just not wanting to have it for fear of hearing something I don't want to hear. There are a number of things a woman doesn't want to hear/see at an ultrasound. I always get a little anxious that there will be a problem with the baby but this time it's more stuff like "baby is not cooperating, I can't see the gender" or "everything looks great...you won't be getting another u/s" or "it's a boy". With every child so far they have been able to see the gender in the u/s and every subsequent one. I have already posted about our "luck" with ultrasounds. I have had the wonderful opportunity to see our babies SEVERAL times before they are born for fear of complications of some kind, but all have been born perfectly perfect.

I am just hoping that they will be able to see the gender, that I will maybe get another u/s at some point (not that I want something to be wrong with my precious unborn), and yes, I am REALLY hoping for a girl. I have two sisters myself and I would really love for my Princess to have at least one. Don't get me wrong, I adore every single one of my Frog Princes and I will be ecstatic to have another boy. We have been so blessed with four healthy children and I hope that streak continues. Not to mention the fact that I (and the princess) adore everything pink and lacey and little girl adorable. Oh and each of the kids (we'll just assume E too, although he does not express his wishes) wants a little sister. When the three oldest say prayers for meals or family prayers, they all pray that "Mommy can have a baby girl and our Aunt Jessies can have baby boys." SO CUTE!

Anyway, no matter what they can tell me, the ultrasound is this coming Tuesday. I am already losing sleep over it!!

When you know...you know.

I have noticed that there is a certain instinct that comes with being a Mom. By no means am I an expert of any sort, but there is a little feeling that I get. Like what the infant is crying for (food, sleep, etc.), or that the silence of a toddler is not always a good sign, or when a baby has a simple cough or is really sick, or when the older child is not telling you the whole story, or when something bad has happened and they're not sure if they can/should tell you, and the list could go on. There are always certain signs too...lethargy and lack of appetite in a severely sick child, shoe polish on the wall after said silence, a lack of eye contact when "finished" with the aforementioned kind of story, or the look in their eyes of embarrassment and hurt and sadness.

I also experience this feeling when things just simply aren't as they should be. You know, like something is off, wrong, not as I left it. For example...

Exhibit A

When I come up the stairs to go to bed and see my door in this position, I get that feeling. That feeling that I will walk to the bedroom at the end of the hall and see this...

Exhibit B

The empty toddler bed that a certain three year old was tucked in to a matter of hours ago. And that feeling intensifies. I know that I will go back to that closed door, open it and find...

Exhibit C

That cute little boy snoozing in my bed!!

This is just a silly example that happens with my third-born fairly often but I have had some very real and very difficult experiences with this 'Motherly instinct'. I am sure to have countless more given that my children are young, but the one thing I have learned is to LISTEN to that instinct...it's almost ALWAYS right.

The Cut

I have had requests to post pictures of my hair cut....

So this is it. For the first time ever, I didn't really want to cut it. But it needed to be done. I think that may be why I am not so keen on it. Oh, and the stylist was TERRIBLE. Anyway, I will let it grow some and maybe find someone good to cut it right. In the mean time, it's hair and it works without looking too terrible.

Ugh

Life is pretty boring around here. I am slowly feeling better every day and all the kids are healthy at the moment. We went to the circus the other day and I totally forgot my camera. We had gotten the tickets for free but softie Dad paid for the kids to do everything there was to do once we were in the doors. Elephant rides, light up swords and all the overpriced food they could eat. The kids did great and we all had a blast.

I did, in fact, cut my hair short. I didn't really want to but the mop definitely needed a new start. I don't have pictures because I am not really digging it. The lady was not good (I really need to find a stylist I like and trust) and could not even understand what I wanted, much less accomplish it. After three redoes with her, I was done.

Exciting life, I know.

Valentine's Day

The most exciting part of V Day was the party at A's classroom. I am a room parent and my so wonderful co-room parent really has been doing most of the work, so I was excited to finally be able to help with something. Anyway, A's hair was done and she was off.

I organized and did the craft for the class. They decorated and ate cupcakes, along with other goodies and then they passed out their Valentine cards. Oh my. That is an event. Her class has 26 students, that is a lot of cards for them to pass out. Anyway, we finished up, cleaned up and we were off... to Kansas City that is.

Yeah, that was our family activity for this romantic holiday. It all started forever ago when John mentioned he wanted a Suburban. It was easy to dismiss his manly ridiculousness because there was NO need for a vehicle that large and I was perfectly in love with the Odyssey. Well, when we found out we were expecting child number 5...the need was there, much to my my dismay. Now, a minivan seats seven, no problem right? Well, the problem arises when we travel. With my parents in UT, we travel long distances at least a couple times a year. Every time we do we don't have enough room. What with car seats, diapers, strollers, bouncers, suitcases, camping stuff and the stuff I buy while I am there that I have to get home, the minivan just doesn't cut it. We don't bring everything I would like and I end up leaving stuff that doesn't fit on the way back. To be honest, I can't even fit all the groceries back there when I go grocery shopping every couple of weeks.

Anyway, John pushed for a Suburban and I conceited that he might have a point about the cargo space. So on V Day we headed out to look at one that we thought to be very promising. Nope. I sat in that thing and I was sure there was NO WAY I was trading my van for this. So we headed to dinner and then home. The next day John was off so we headed down to Wichita to look at another one that we were really interested in. It was a little older but in great condition and had way less miles on it. We checked it out, drove it around, then drove it home. We really got a wonderful deal on The Beast and we sold our Odyssey last night and were able to save some money in the process. I am adjusting to driving something bigger all the time and the van will be missed. Here is The Beast...

Sorry the pics are in the garage. I am just not that excited about it to put any effort into the pictures. So V-day was non existent here. John and I didn't even say "Happy Valentine's Day" to each other. Sad. We were just busy I guess. Next year will just have to be extra special.

Birthday

The two year old is now three!! As mentioned before, we were going to take the kids to a certain children's pizza joint but, with the stomach bug going around here last week, we decided not to go. Grandma Kathi came up and we had cake and ice cream for lunch last Saturday. He got some really awesome books from Grandma, a new GeoTrax train set, and some Buzz toys. Grandma and Grandpa Love's gift hasn't gotten here yet but the excitement will all be renewed when he gets a package in the mail. 

Isaac is a handful. He is impatient, stubborn and he doesn't listen. Sounds like a two year old, right? He is also a sweet little boy. He still likes to cuddle and rub someone's ear. He adores his sister and brothers as long as they don't bother him...the affection must be on his terms. He is learning to count and say the alphabet right now but he still has a hard time with his colors. Ike loves all things Buzz, Lightning or Thomas. He is also conviced the cat must be locked in the basement at all times. Isaac is such a wonderful part of our family and I am so grateful to have him in my life. Happy Birthday Boy!!

PS His wrist is doing fine. I took off that fancy splint the other day and he has acted like nothing happened. I had to cancel his appt. on Tuesday so we'll see what the doc says when he does see him. I am guessing he was just sore and afraid it was going to hurt because now you wouldn't even know he had hurt it at all.

Not Much

As in...not much is going on around here....still. Life is just sit back and not do much. I am still not feeling well at all. I have actually had a few OK days which have been welcome. I just picked up the last prescription for the progesterone which means I only have three more weeks on it. Once I am done with that, I should start feeling much better. Three more weeks!!

In other news, we are getting ready for A's Valentine party at school on the 14th and I's birthday coming up next week. He has decided on a Batman birthday shirt (we'll see if/how that turns out) and a Woody and Buzz cake. With John's crazy schedule, we just decided to take the kids to Chucky Cheese for lunch and maybe do the cake and presents there after we eat. The kids don't know yet, but I am sure anything that involves Chucky Cheese will be a-o-k.

J started karate last week and he loves it. I was really worried when we showed up, he was in such a bad mood. But he really enjoyed it and is excited to learn more. We are really hoping it will help him to focus all his crazy boy energy and teach him some patience and practice listening to a teach. He is also looking forward to some T-ball this summer and a basketball clinic coming up in a couple weeks. I just hope they go better than soccer last year. A is excited to try her hand at tennis and softball this coming spring and summer. She really loved soccer last year too so we might try a shorter season somewhere of that also.

So we're not doing much right now, but we're all excited for the coming spring season when Mommy is feeling better, the weather clears up and we have some fun activities going on.